If We Want to be Very Creative

Chris Erickson


IF WE WANT TO BE VERY CREATIVE, we can work with our nation's engineers about how to figure out how to help pump slurry with Dudley Moore's out-and-out recorded active squawk-power. It's all power loads. It's a motor. Perhaps I am being fanciful in this house, but I am trying hard to think it through through different channels. I even filmed myself on my phone explaining these ideas apart. Would you rather have this or have droughts? If there are droughts, if we are running out of things, we can take action and make adjustments in the kingdom itself.

I can explain. First, think of those early scenes in Arthur, those first couple scenes. That's the source of this idea. The stuff with that hooker, that stuff. There was some stuff in the middle of the picture, but mostly it's those early scenes where it's just fucking relentless; I got my idea watching that. And that's we're talking just what made it in the finished picture. Think of what was cut, and think of alternate takes, every take, and the bloopers, and the rehearsals, and the auditions process. For God sakes, think of there was a time where a raw-throated Moore was finding the squawk earlier, in his earlier life. As a child with his hair, as a baby in England, as a previous life. I believe all this. All that power. I believe it's a resource. There's so much power sitting around everywhere in the past that there has to be that much in this moment as well. Even a weird, mumbling female baby on a windswept plateau from the prehistoric ages has power loads.

My point is, if we can calm down a minute, a female technician named Trudy could “audio loop” the Arthur squawks. I don't know how if how we would take wires and channel the power into the cutterhead from a floating power station, or if we would use an amp, turn it all the way, and channel it at it. My hope is the energy would wash over the dredger and get absorbed into the motors. After all, we do not want too many shutdowns, and we do not want too many clogs. Trudy can help. These are clearly fanciful methods to supplement power. I know that. This may seem like a complete fantasy from a idiot but that's not what I'm really doing. Someone probably thinks, “He is so ignorant!” Well, but, bare minimum, let's pay, let's have Trudy assess my solutions for these droughts, and if you have any, if we are running out of things. We can make a task force. My idea is simply a jumping off point. But it's an idea for a task force.

Another thing, if we want to be creative, we could load into Grampa's Continental and drive out to that basin in Bethany where you can see everything and have Dodley Moore wear a cashmere trench and, and go out and do power-squawks in there to make the slurry dewater faster. Not into a device, just out in the open, parallel to the road. It's not like he would have to go that far out there by himself. It's not like he'd have to scale an embankment. It's not like we would have to do more than ten or fifteen minutes to make a test, film it, and then download it. We wouldn't want Moore right by the car because it would be too loud, and it would bother Gramma, and anyway the car and our clothes and hair would muffle it. Gramma's hair would absorb all the power. She would set there with all that kind of power loaded up in her hair. Then, we would all start waiting! No, we would have to tinker with the distance; I'm not blind to that. Dudley Moore wouldn't face us or face anything. It's supposed to partly make it dewater. We're simply testing it together as a task force. We could download the results. We could place it on a thumb drive.

I have this utterly creative mindset where I believe in all kinds of things. It brings up the idea of what difference does this make? One thing, we wouldn't need that hooker with us in that basin in Bethany; she would be stationed out on the power station, on Municipal Lake. She could tell if it's powering it, if it's helping it. She could see if it's giving it power in collaboration with Trudy. They could all look at the cutterhead at once together in the same second. They could all listen. She would know more than your average citizen would, given that she has worked on a film with Moore in their past. Trudy and the rest of the participating engineers and workers on the power station would more believe her ideas and so would everyone, and everyone would give her generous treatment. She would live forever. That hooker would live forever.

Then we could go get something to eat or whatever anybody feels like.


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Chris Erickson is out of Decatur, Illinois. He wrote Henrytown (2025). A first. Under the old tarp: The New Equipment.












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